当父母为了特殊的特权和关注而挑出一个孩子时，这个孩子往往不知道这种关系是不健康的，甚至是乱伦的。作为成年人，这些孩子很难感受到被认可的感觉，因为虽然他们没有受到直接虐待，但他们感觉到一种被侵犯和跨越边界的感觉——通常以“爱”和“关心”的名义进行。父母的爱比自由更受约束，比给予更苛刻，比养育更具侵扰性。然而，这些孩子受到心理学家肯尼斯·亚当斯（Kenneth Adams）所说的无声诱惑的折磨——因为没有什么爱或关心密切的亲子关系能满足父母而不是孩子的需求。
在这本经过修订和更新的20周年纪念版的开创性著作《无声诱惑》中，亚当斯博士解释了“亲密感”，尤其是与异性父母的亲密感，并不是图片所暗示的舒适感的来源，尤其是当孩子被父母的代理伴侣从童年欺骗时。他提供了一个框架来理解这种隐蔽的乱伦及其对性、亲密和关系的影响，以及受害者如何开始康复过程。
Silently Seduced: When Parents Make Their Children Partners (Audiobook)
When a parent singles out a child for special privileges and attention, that child is often unaware that the relationship is unhealthy – even incestuous. As adults, these children struggle to feel validated, because while they have not been directly abused, they feel a sense of violation and crossed boundaries – usually done in the name of ‘love’ and ‘caring’. The parent’s love feels more confining than freeing, more demanding than giving, more intrusive than nurturing. Yet these children suffer from what psychologist Kenneth Adams calls The Silent Seduction – because there is nothing loving or caring about a close parent-child relationship that services the needs of the parent rather than the child.
In this revised and updated 20th anniversary edition of his groundbreaking book Silently Seduced, Dr. Adams explains how ‘feeling close’, especially with the opposite-sex parent, is not the source of comfort the image suggests, especially when that child is cheated out of a childhood by being a parent’s surrogate partner. He offers a framework to understand this covert incest and its effect on sexuality, intimacy, and relationships, and how victims can begin the process of recovery.
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